Thursday, March 4, 2010

Can we 86 it??

"Do they think I am retarded?"

"Stop acting like a retard!"

"That is so retarded!"

The definition of "retard" in the dictionary: "to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede".

Yes, that is Miss Molly and all of the other children with Down Syndrome. She doesn't learn as quickly as her twin sister or her brothers or her peers. She is slow to develop in language/expressive language and fine and gross motor.

But does this give you a right to use her as an example when someone or yourself does or says something STUPID? She doesn't know any better but YOU do!!!!

This topic is all over the DS blogging community so I really don't think I need to elaborate on it.

We have all said it. Yup, even me and Michael. But things are different for us now and let me tell you, if Gavin, Maggie, or Austin even thinks of using this word, there will be hell to pay.

It is, honestly, one of my greatest fears that, one day, Molly will hear this and be hurt. How can you hurt such a sweet baby girl? I mean, really. She will eventually know that society views her as "mentally retarded". I will not be the one to disclose this to her but I have no doubt that some insensitive child will.

So, I am not here to "order" us adults from using this word. Why? Because it was how we were raised. My mother, as great of a woman as she is, never scolded me for using such language.

What I am asking is that all that reads this, to teach your children that the word "retard" is a BAD word and it hurts. It will, one day, hurt my sweet, sweet, Molly. For for all the children blessed enough to have Down Syndrome, PLEASE teach your child right from wrong. PLEASE teach them to refrain from using the word retard.

Because it hurts.


stephanie said...

Tracy it is you!!! OMG I've been thinking of you and wondering if you were OK. I read the comment you left at my blog and it didn't click.I came here to just see who you were. Your comment was so sweet. As I was reading i saw your name and the twins... there can't be two Tracy's with twins and then I saw the post about Sweet Lera. How many nights I stayed awake praying and crying for that little one. When I didn't see anyone blogging updates about her I thought the worst. I'm reduced to those sloppy tears right now, because I'm so happy she found her forever home and you're still here.
Your family is beautiful, so, so beautiful. it's so good to "see" you again.

Rebekah said...

I worked at a camp for adults with special needs from the time I was 15 until I graduated from college. I'm loving reading about your sweet Molly because she reminds me of my sweet special friends. No counselors or campers - all "special friends." I loved all of them, but a few of the special friends with Down syndrome really stole my heart with their spunk, humor, and unconditional love for everyone. Those were some of the happiest weeks of my life, and I was blessed to know so many wonderful people.

And my husband isn't allowed to use the r-word. It's one of the few things I said "you're not allowed" to do. Our children won't either.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for writing this. I also have a daughter with special needs named Molly. She is 13 and I live in fear about someone hurting her with the R word. I don't want anyone to diminish her with one cruel word. We all need to keep speaking out for the Molly's! Check out what we're doing on Facebook to get them to take down the groups that mock our kids.